An investigation confirmed that the solar eclipse was staged by Brown Admissions as a scheme to get students on the Main Green for brochure photos.
“We looked closely into the issue and found extensive proof that the whole thing was a hoax,” said a student representative from Brown Flat Earth Society.
A new report from experts at Brown have confirmed that the only thing constant across the multiverse is Dean of The College Rashid Zia double concentrating in Engineering and English.
“We’ve recently discovered that even the laws of physics do not apply equally to all universes, but Dean Zia embodies the spirit of the Open Curriculum in all dimensions,” said Astrophysicist Samson Clark, taking note of the billions of Dean Zias, using billions of different dialects, to communicate the Brunonian mindset grounded in independent, innovative leaders.
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