“She’s All Mine (Oh Yeah, Girl),” a song by influential rock group The Beatles is, in retrospect, really making an effort to stress that the woman in the song is just a little girl.
“I see her walking down the street (oh yeah) / She’s that little girl I’d like to meet,” begins the 1966 song which starts off okay before leaning a bit too heavily on the whole “little girl” thing.
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Shaking his head in confusion with an exasperated sigh, the go-to expositional character in crime procedural NCFBIS complained that the case just didn’t make any sense, immediately before summarizing the events of every prior episode.
“We know she was having an affair with her psychologist and frequently left the city to see her estranged daughter,” said Officer Jim Greene, conveniently paraphrasing the season-long arc that has been pointing to the inevitability of this exact moment for weeks.
After clicking the link to enter a scheduled Zoom meeting, area man Graham Anderson reported that he wasn’t sure if he was connected to the audio, give him one sec.
“Oops… sorry everyone… looks like I’m having a little trouble connecting… let me just…” mumbled Anderson as he fiddled around with the Zoom audio hardware settings.
Gliding a fresh stick of Burt’s Bees across her cracked lips, area woman Julia Dupree recently accepted that she is nothing more than a slave to Big Chapstick. “The chapstick companies pump it out, and I gobble it up like a piggy at the trough,” Dupree sighed, recounting how, no matter how many chapsticks she already has, she keeps buying them under the omnipresent force of the lip balm industry.
Partly Cloudy, 64°
