In a fun, hands-on approach to learning about organized terrorism, 1,200 high school students from all over the state congregated in, and then seized, the Providence Hilton for the annual 3-day Model Terrorism Conference last weekend, sources confirm.
Despite being widely hailed as a beautiful sign of spring, the chirps of the birds heard throughout the country are actually pretty fucked up, sources report.
An independent congressional watchdog group revealed yesterday that Representative Kevin Cramer (R-N.D.) was for some reason being paid for votes by the toy company Hasbro.
According to his children, local dad Henry McFerrin is singing the guitar solo from Guns N’ Roses’ “Sweet Child o’ Mine” on the drive to school again.
McFerrin’s children emphasized the fact that their father would break into loud vocal renditions of guitar solos three to four times a week.
Club-goers at Ultra, a popular Providence nightlife destination, reported that house DJ Mike Tobert has not touched his equipment in the past twenty minutes.
“He pressed a key on his Macbook a little while ago,” said club-goer Christina Tomlinson, “but he’s just kind of been hopping around the stage ever since.
Partly Cloudy, 64°
