In a press conference held by the International Consortium of Zoologists on Tuesday, scientists reported that horses would be much faster if they had wheels.
“A horse can gallop at 25 or 30 miles per hour,” said Greg Beckham, the head scientist on the project.
A new report by the UN Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) is just a single GIF of the Earth disintegrating into billions of pieces.
“This report is the result of a six-month multidisciplinary effort,” stated Dr. Rona Humphrey, one of the authors of the report.
Sources report that an old man in a new movie was once a young man in an old movie. “That man is definitely old,” film analysts reported, referring to the new movie. “But if you take a look at this old movie, you’ll find that the same man is young.
President Donald Trump stepped down from office this Wednesday following a brutal tweet from your aunt. “In light of the recent tweet from @BlueWaveMartha67 calling me, among other things, ‘mango Mussolini’ and ‘tiny hands,’ I have decided to resign from the presidency of the United States,” a visibly shaken Trump announced to a fully packed press room, reading from a prepared statement.
Following a series of meaningless tweets, Lin-Manuel Miranda’s Twitter followers reported that the Hamilton star is tweeting in his own made-up nonsense language at this point.
“I used to like Lin’s tweets,” follower Trey Montagne explained.
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