Noting that the track would be slick, sexy, and dance floor ready, Secretary of Urban Contemporary Development Shaun Harrison told reporters at a cabinet briefing Monday that he is hard at work on a brand new Downtempo R&B jam. “Though we initiated production just a few short days ago, I can say to the American public with confidence that the synths on this number will be cold as ice, smooth as glass, and thick like heavy cream—they crackle like a wood stove, and burn just as nice, too,” Harrison said as he leaned against his podium and fingered a smoking hot groove on his bass guitar.